Humanity Can't be All Crap
by Corrode
Summary: Cass wakes up in a hospital- human...his dealings with that and the nurse who's taking care of him. Emotional-later smut/caring-getting him back on his mortal feet-angst and sex-what more could you ask for.....


**Okay started out as a one shot and took on a life of its own, probably be more of a two or three shot, warnings for smut later on-after all Cass deserves some loving also. This idea came from a bout of meditation-yeah that's right I was doing visual meditation and it popped into my head-got to play it out myself, believe me I'm not complaining. Oh yeah, and I don't own the boys(wish I did)this is my first Cass fic so any advice is welcome-he's a hard one to get a handle on. I've been character studying him for months just to feel comfortable writing him-reading lots of fics, taking notes during show-all that fun stuff. Hope you all enjoy reading as much as I do writing. Love and plot bunnies to all.**

**Corrode**

**Humanity Can't Be All Crap**

**Chapter #1**

**He Sacrificed Himself For This?**

**Contemporary Angel accounts are frequently about unpredictable encounters that have personal significance in the lives of otherwise average people. Most accounts involve some wonderful or mysterious being who appeared when most needed and who was usually only recognized as an Angel in retrospect. **

**Ruth J. Moro, **_**Angels in Our Midst - A Naturalistic Embrace of the Miraculous**_

……**But we are all men, in our own natures frail, and capable of our flesh; few are angels….**

**-----------------William Shakespeare **

Castiel became ''_aware''_ at 6:45 on a Sabbath evening; the irony was not lost on him. This was not the first time he had sacrificed himself and woke not knowing why he wasn't dead. Only this time it felt different- this time there was pain. Not the dull throb that sometimes accompanied his hosts' injuries, before abating completely-but something that felt more permanent.

His whole body felt uncomfortable in fact -and when he tried movement, taping his pinky back and forth-even that was painful. Castiel kept his body stile and his eyelids closed-not curious enough yet to undertake a look. That was when he realized the clenching in his vessels stomach. Another new sensation, and not a pleasant one either.

The smell of the sterile environment was not competently lost on him; neither were the beeps, the uncomfortable pinch of something small and sharp entering his skin, nor the fact that the clothing he now wore was way more comfortable and less confining, even if the clothing left much to be desired, such as undergarments. The only sound response he could assume was that he was in a hospital.

The idea that _he_ Castiel an angel of the lord would be in a hospital-was the most disconcerting thought. Because Castiel knew a _hospital_ was a place men took reprieve to mend.

Amy felt a mess, she'd pulled a double shift had had no time to change-and Mr. Klutch had insisted on another suppository, one thing she had never gotten completely used to. In her defense Amy tried, she smiled and joked with the patients-and she really did like the fact she was helping people. But it was days like this that she felt something, anything was missing from her life.

She gave so much to her patients, and it was sincere……she just felt so _lonely _sometimes. After all she was human-was it too much to ask that some of what she gave in kindness be returned-she was losing hope, and faith, in a happily ever after. Amy sighed, now was not the time to wallow in self pity, she had the rest of the night for that. Grabbing a chart she didn't know whether to be happy or to cry. Part of her was curious about the man listed.

Especially, after hearing her co-workers speak about his situation. The way that he had been shipped off the coast from a shrimping vessel; after suddenly appearing as if from thin air. And the fact that he hadn't regained consciousness making him appear to be brain dead was a mystery in itself. Amy didn't know how much of the story was rumor but found it funny the way the other charge nurses scuttled around tittering like school girls around his corner door. They acted as if they'd never seen a man before; Amy rolled her eyes, tucking her chestnut hair behind her ear where it had come out of place once again. Then hiking her rainbow pattered scrubs up around her waist, she started off towards the strange mans room.

She glanced over the compact writing as her white tennis shoes squeaked over the shinny varnished flooring. At the top in bold lettering was the name John Doe. The medical tests had come back with severe bruising and inner contusions, abrasions as well as spots that seemed almost like burns. They had been using a salve for most of the outer damage-thick white cream and injections of fluids, antibiotics, as well as breathing treatments in hopes no fluid would form on the lungs.

Scanning down to the bottom to see the main objectives for the day Amy almost stopped in stride. They wanted him _cleaned_-a minimal task she hadn't had to perform since her beginning apprenticeship. Of course, since he was unresponsive it would be mainly a quick rub down with a damp cloth, and a redressing of the wounds if needed. But a job such as this wouldn't leave her much free time-and okay that was a little childish-but damnit over the past 24 hour work shift she needed a rest.

Briskly, passing through the elevator doors Amy made a bee-line for the charge heads counter, determined to get her orders changed. She avoided the set of wooden doors which led to the intensive care unit, almost like John Doe would take offence to her anger, and stood practically radiating heat at the woman's profile.

'' Bunny, I've been on the floor for 24….I need a break….'' Amy started and was cut off by a vicious stare that might as well of been a snarl.

'' Listen Madigan, were short staffed so unless your loosing blood as we speak….we need an able body to care for John Doe..''

Amy pointed to the order showing her the extent and time the work would take, but by now looking at Bunny's rumpled uniform and smudged make-up Amy was starting to feel like an ass.

'' I'm sorry Bunny…. I've just been looking forward to that break all day..'' Amy apologized.

'' Look Amy he won't give you any trouble I promise….besides from what I hear he's very handsome….'' Bunny winked as if that should make up for everything.

'' Lovely, the only action I get is from Mr. comatose…..'' Amy grumbled, before swallowing her pride and pivoting towards the door.

'' And don't worry, take your time….oh and don't forget to close the door-wouldn't want any of those starry eyed interns '' _accidentally'' _getting an eye-full..'' And with that Bunny winked again making Amy wonder if this was some kind of private joke at her expense, what the hell was up with everyone around here?

So Amy couldn't help a macabre sense of anxiety as she neared his door the beeping on his monitor thumping along with her own heart. What the hell was wrong with her? She'd managed so far to stay away from his room, even going so far as to glance in the other direction when passing. For some reason this patient, out of all the others caused her uneasiness she couldn't explain. And it wasn't as if she hadn't seen any head trauma cases before.

She thought maybe it had something to do with her general morose attitude as of late, and the idea that in this world God would let someone languish away, wasting beneath wires and thin cotton blankets, kept alive on feeding tubes and ventilators-while the rest of the world sped on. Amy ached for this unnamed man. Unfortunately, today she had no choice but to confront that ache….Okay she would just go in, do her thing- and _get out_.

Castiel heard the rustle of fabric, and smelt the hint of perfume. He felt no need to let the human see him, more importantly he was not sure he wanted to give himself away just yet. Not only that but he had a feeling it would hurt to open his eyes as well. So he laid stile trying to gather his muddled thoughts and arrange an exchange with this creature.

Castiel knew it was female as her soft humming brought a strange gentle assurance he also had never experienced until then. It reminded him of dew filled ocean breezes and meadows full of wildflowers. Why this was so he had no idea, but he suddenly wanted a look at this woman and so slanted his eyes just enough not to be painful, and not to alert the maiden who stood preparing a silver tray full of objects.

Some he recognized such as the bandages and the cloths, others bothered him-like the small metallic handled grips with points at the curved end. Castiel wondered if this was how Alastar felt as Dean wheeled in his table of confections. Yet something about this seemed different, and so Castiel continued to watch the caramel haired girl/ woman ready her approach.

And after what seemed entirely too long Castiel let his eyelids drop in exhaustion-his amnesty wouldn't last long. And that was when she started talking to him.

Amy finally took the time to glance down toward John Doe; she was flicking his feeding tube to check for air bubbles and could only just see the top of his dark thick hair. It had a scruff to it that stuck out at odd angles on the top and towards the forehead, looking almost boyish. She had been putting off the process as long as she could, uneasy and trying not to be. Amy always hummed when she was uneasy or talked too much-she wondered if he could hear her since the doctors wouldn't know his true condition until he actually woke up.

It's not as if she hadn't talked to patients before-of course they usually responded-but hey it would make her feel better-she hated the quiet punctuated only by the machines.

'' Perhaps we should try and scrub some of the gunk from that hair of yours John..'' Amy leaned in crinkling her nose.

It took a moment for Casstiel to realize she must be talking to him, what was wrong with his vessels hair -he never paid much attention to it. He wanted to tell her as much but waited once more, if only he could get an understanding of the situation-it would give him the upper hand. What if this was all a trap? Could he possibly be in some kind of Limbo, or worse purgatory?

'' Well John….hope you don't embarrass easy…..'' Amy said, and then continued.

'' We'll start with the parts that aren't covered…'' Here goes nothing she thought, turning with cloth in hand and running the warmth down John Does forehead.

Amy thought she felt a slight jerk but then passed it off as nerves on her part. She was reluctant to admit all those swooning cronies of hers had been right. He had large set eyes with dark lashes, the creases above gave him a thoughtful look even in sleep and his eyebrows were thick probably very expressive when he was awake. His jaw line was almost heart shaped with a quiet slope under a long pretty mouth. These features taken apart were not completely remarkable but together they were pretty, it made Amy wonder about the color of his eyes.

Lost in thought Amy kept talking, complimenting the stranger on his refined profile-until she found herself giggling at how ridiculous she must sound. She hoped no-one could hear her at that position pointing out the refined features of a not so conscious man.

'' You'll have to excuse me-you just happen to have a very sexy aura-you're probably a jerk in real anyhow….'' Amy could feel the texture of his lips through the cloth, and found herself daydreaming of what they might taste like.

'' God what kind of professional am I? Thinking about kissing you when you're down for the count….'' She sighed, why in a way he was practically a cadaver.

Casstiel heard the girl and part of him responded to the idea of her lips on his, not the vocal part, it was a tightening, just barely, to a part of his hosts body he'd never really paid attention to. Casstiel wasn't ignorant of the bodies workings it had just never been that important. He had other things to worry about. And although his short time at the place of iniquity had not been solicitous, he had gleaned enough to understand…almost- what that awareness of body felt like.

Casstiel wondered if perhaps he should make himself known before it became obvious in _that_ part of his body, where his judgment had wandered. That was when he heard the sound of snapping above his shoulders; along with the tickle of open air. Casstiel was so perplexed by that point he tried considering his strategy.

1-Some kind of movement-even if it involved pain-to arrest the maiden's attention…

2-Yank away the offending machinery, and brace himself for more pain and then, then..

3-Get away as quickly as his body would allow…

It was a sound plan, but he didn't think he would make it very far, as the pain was worsening the more he considered actual movement.

'' Guess I shouldn't put it off any longer…..'' Amy's hands shook as she worked awkwardly at the ties on the hospital robe, first the top one and then Cass's thin layer of modesty, his blanket was brushed to the side-causing a wave of cold.

In reflex Casstiel shivered staring down at his exposed chest and up into Amy's doe like eyes.

Amy shocked- quickly registered one thing: his eyes were a beautiful, if a bit surprised: blue.

As calmly as Amy could she reached over pressing the call button-Mr. Comatose was awake, and the doctor would want to know. Unfortunately, that meant she would have to wait and give a report. Amy stepped back and crossed her arms, eyeing him speculatively. And damn it if Mr. Comatose wasn't giving her the same wary eye.

'' How long….?'' Amy asked lifting her brow above her coalesce eyes. Coma boy tilted his head at an adorable angle and Amy pushed aside the warning bells.

'' I don't understand what you are asking…'' he answered. Amy sighed ruffling back her hair in an effort to release some of her tension but only managing to loosen the knot at the back. His voice was deep and gravely and although somewhat strained had some kind of authority to it.

'' I felt you move earlier. ..…..'' Amy moved closer trying for a nurse Ratchet intimidation technique because even lying as he was now- she felt like the invalid.

'' My names not John..'' he said as response. Great who knew how long he'd been listening to her prattle on?

'' No shit Sherlock….'' Amy declared before she had a chance to curb her tongue, his vague answers were rattling her nerves…She'd have to go for blunt with this one.

'' I don't understand your reference….'' he said before she had a chance to try again and then to further her outrage.

'' What you were doing…..The warm cloth was nice on my vessel….but the other was drafty…''

Her eyes widened. His vessel! She had not touched that part of him-what the hell was he talking about? Amy looked down at said appendage, unable not to when he brought it up and he brung his own eyes to rest where hers did. Amy licked her lips nervously trying to stutter some kind of response. While Casstiel continued studying his crotch as if he wondered what she was seeing. It was nothing more than a series of shapes beneath the cloth, why did this maid look at it like it was dangerous. Casstiel raised his brows as if in question studying Amy with a careful exactitude.

'' I didn't touch your vessel what are you some kind of pervert….''

And then again with the head tilt, in her direction, he studied her visage- his brows drawing upwards.

Why was this girl so upset with him, Casstiel wondered, he was the one in pain. And why did the flame in her reddened cheeks seem so appealing to him right now?

'' I do not wish to twist or lead your mind astray…..'' he answered softly.

'' What the hell does that have to do with anything…..'' Amy turned away unable to take his probing gaze.

'' You called me a pervert….'' came his reply which was cut short by some kind of moaning growl, it was concentrated and raised the skin on the back of her neck.

Amy reacted quickly with a nurses caring reflexes, no matter if he confused and pissed her off that kind of pain, even if not her own, always bit her down to the bone. She turned on her heel unaware of the hair that had come completely undone; her back towards the window Amy came towards the pretty man.

Casstiel was surprised by the abrupt change in her demeanor, as her hair fell around her the window pixilated the strands from behind, it gave her a sort of ethereal glow. And then the smile, how could she smile and manage to curb the edge of his sharpest pains like that.

Then she was on him- delicate fingers pushing at the hair along his temples, over his neck and shoulders-almost like she knew where the pain was the keenest. The whole time whispering in a soothing voice. It was the strongest showing of unconditional thoughtlessness Casstiel had ever experienced. And that's when he told her.

'' My names Casstiel….''

**a/n-End scene, yes this will go on-surprised to me-but you know how muses are they do as they please, and lately my muse had takin a shine to Cass-please let me know what you think-luvs and plot bunnies---Corrode**


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